The Anti-Slush Coalition: "Powder Is a Human Right!"

Hundreds gathered in the city center this weekend holding signs that read:

"Down with Slush!"

"Powder Is a Human Right!"

"If There Is Slush, You Checked the Wrong Forecast!"

At first glance, it looked like an environmental protest.

It wasn't.

It was a demonstration organized by a newly formed movement called The Anti-Slush Coalition — a group claiming that slush is responsible for ruined weekends, damaged relationships, and widespread winter frustration.

Reporting from the Protest

Reporter: What are you protesting today?

Man in ski goggles, downtown: "We're fighting for winter dignity! Slush is psychological torture. You plan for powder and you get wet garbage."

Reporter: And what's your proposed solution?

Woman holding a 'Zero Slush Policy' banner: "Education. People need to stop blindly trusting the first forecast they see. There are more accurate sources. When you know powder is coming, you're not miserable at home."

The crowd begins chanting:

"No More Slush! No More Lies!"

The founder of the movement, a former IT analyst, explains:

Founder: "Slush isn't just a snow condition. It's a mental state. It's disappointment. It's frustration. It's a lost weekend. We're saying: check your data properly. Use reliable snow forecasting. Don't let bad information ruin your mood."

The protest remained peaceful.

There was only one minor incident: one participant slipped on wet pavement.

The irony was not officially addressed.